Going home for the holidays: How to ensure your child with autism enjoys their vacation with extended family

It’s that time of year again. Many families with children with autism will be visiting family and friends this holiday season. The prospect of spending this time away from your own home can be scary for your child, especially if they have trouble with transitions, but there are ways to make it easier for everyone involved. If you’re going to visit the grandparents and relatives, try these ways to ensure your child with autism enjoys their vacation with the extended family.

1. Talk to Your Child in Advance About What to Expect

Children with autism may worry about what to expect during the visit or have a difficult time communicating their feelings or needs to their parents. Try talking to your child in advance about what to expect and what they're looking forward to. Talk to them about what is happening each day, who they will be spending time with, where you'll be going, and other information that might help prepare them for the trip. 

Create visual schedules of the days ahead so your child can see everything planned out before it happens. It's also helpful if you know when any transitions will happen (like getting up and leaving for an outing). If your child has difficulty with transitions, make sure you give him enough warning before any changes take place.

2. Keep as much Structure but Allow Flexibility

It's important not to do too many activities they have never done before or visit too many places that are unfamiliar to them because this can cause anxiety. Stay in one place for at least a few days, and then venture out after they become more comfortable and settled. In addition, be sure to plan plenty of downtimes so kids don't get overwhelmed. 

Pay attention when your child wants to try something new. They may want to go somewhere not included in your itinerary or eat food they are not used to. You can always say no if you think it will be too much for them, but sometimes just letting them try is enough motivation for them to continue trying other new things without being constantly pushed by you.

3. Celebrating with Family and Friends

Show your child photos of relatives and guests so they're prepared for who they'll meet, and prepare a script to help them get motivated and understand what they need to do. A designated quiet room for when your child gets overwhelmed is helpful to have at gatherings because it can be difficult for kids with autism to manage sensory input from people in large crowds or unfamiliar places.

4. Giving and Opening Gifts

The best way to prepare is to practice giving and opening gifts in advance. It’s also essential to make sure everyone is aware of any special needs or preferences. For example, if you know that your child will be upset by certain sounds, tell your loved ones about this in advance so they avoid buying gifts that might irritate your child.

Prepare a script for your child to say when receiving presents, such as “thank you, I really appreciate your gift.” You can use prompts to encourage them to say it. You can also practice opening and giving gifts together, which can help reduce your child’s anxiety about feeling pressured when others watch them open gifts in front of an audience.

5. Make New Traditions

It’s important to keep in mind that your child with autism can be overwhelmed by a change in environment and sensory input. As such, it’s essential to make new traditions that comfort your child. One way to do this is by adding your child’s favorite activity to your holiday festivities. This will help reduce the number of new things your child has to focus on during the holiday season. You can also create a new tradition by choosing a small holiday activity that you’ve never done before but may be enjoyable to your child. This will give both of you something fun and exciting to look forward to during your trip.